A Poem For Him

These times are hard, but they bring us together.

Clutching each other, through the worst of weather.

You’re the last piece of my puzzle , the knot at the end of my rope.

Without you I would’ve lost all hope.

You are always so calm, and put me at ease.

When all goes wild, and I just want to leave.

We are together forever, for this was sworn.

You and I share a bond that may never be torn.

Age Is Just A Number

This past weekend was my birthday, and as many of you know it isn’t polite to ask a lady her age. But frankly, I don’t care. I turned 25, and the only thought in my mind was, “Shit five years from thirty.”

I would be lying if I denied that it didn’t weigh my mind down with thoughts of the unknown and possibilities of what lies ahead. Not to mention the fact that my husband reminded me of it the whole week prior to my birthday. But I have come to the conclusion that I am not afraid of what my future holds for me, I am ready to embrace it in an aggressive bear hug. I had an epiphany during an event on my birthday…

On that day my friend and I did something out of the ordinary for us. We usually stay close to home, have some wine, or go to a restaurant. But on this day we attended a concert. This concert is one that I am not ashamed to say I went to, because in “my day” this particular band was a VERY big deal.

The Backstreet Boys were playing at Nautica Pavilion in Cleveland, and I felt it was my duty to attend. I mean one of the band members was my first boyfriend, (so I thought at 13) and obviously came so I could finally fulfill my destiny. I had tickets to see this band when I was younger but had the chance stripped away. Which left me upset and wearing the Nick Carter t-shirt for a week…(sigh). My friend and I had decided we were dead set on going, this was MY birthday after all, it had to be fate.

When we arrived the place was crawling with people our age and some older. I had grabbed a beer , and she her nachos, as we made our way into the venue. Our seats were very good and I was excited that even though I didn’t invest in the expensive tickets we still had an exceptional view.  I felt comfortable and had a little bit of a buzz when a group of teenage something’s loudly made their way up the stairs and of course sat right next to us. They were loud, and always found a way to have their asses in my face while they were taking pictures. This had eventually sent me over the edge due to the fact that one had her hair practically in my beer and that was a no- no.

But enough with the negativity, we won’t dwell on that. Needless to say it didn’t take her long to “check herself”.  The point I am getting ready to make is that as soon as the show started The Backstreet Boys all looked and sounded exactly the same. I knew they were all past the age I had originally listened to them at and I was amazed that nothing had really changed. Everyone was cheering and dancing, (as was I) and I felt like I was 13 again. I found myself getting the same excitement as the younger version of myself! Minus the “weird feelings” everyone feels at the age when they see a person of the opposite sex, we are way beyond that point people. I even began to appreciate some of the less annoying girls next to me because at a point I blended right in when the perfect song came on.

That moment was exactly what I needed to free my mind of the adult stress we all face, and to let go of my concept of age. Age is really just a number, and we are all as young as we feel. Life is too serious and sometimes we all get caught up in the more grown-up parts of it. It really feels good to just let your hair down and take in all the moments surrounding you. Believe it or not you will feel young, wild, and free. As far as the office stuff and the adult life, that shit can wait.

Stay beautiful,

Tabitha

Why buy the cow when the milk is free?

So as many of you know I am married. I am HAPPILY married. I had gotten lucky and landed my man at a young age. We have been together ever since. Some of my girlfriends and other young women I have run into say that I am not so lucky. I hear,” You never dated!” and also, “You never experienced different men and sex!” I always start with a smile, but end with a solid (and sometimes hurtful) answer in response.

I would NOT fit into this “dating” world today. Why? Well because “dating” to most people now is going out to a cheap and shitty restaurant, and immediately screwing afterwards. There is no thought , or time put into the date, it is clearly all about getting laid. I’m not a saint and I don’t believe in passing too much judgment on people. But I personally wouldn’t have sex on the first date. The following are just a few reasons why:

1. You do not know this person! And casual conversation at Applebee’s isn’t going to cut it.

2.  You could have a terrible and traumatic experience. Not everyone who is nice to you can be trusted.

3. Self R-E-S-P-E-C-T…(I am currently singing Aretha Franklin in my mind)

4. STD’s, nobody is worth a wart.

5. Sex is something that should be worked for, and looked forward too.

6. Why buy the cow, when the milk is free?

I mean seriously. Why would that person feel the need to wine and dine you? You are easy to get into the sack. For your sake I hope they don’t judge you as a person based on your sexual encounter, sometimes the first times aren’t always the best of times. (Unless you’re a seasoned professional)

So no I am not sad I didn’t date, because I wouldn’t do that shit anyways. I would probably be the solo person at dinner who swore off men because they get an erection when the wind blows.  I have seen and heard of too many potential relationships failing due to promiscuity.

Do yourself a favor and decide what YOU want. Are you “dating” for the thrill and sex? If so get it on. Just remember there are few successful and strong relationships that are built out of just the physical. If you decide that you want more long term, hold out. Not forever, not for years, just until you know you are ready and you know that person.

Look at sex like a rare diamond. It takes work and time to obtain, but when it is had it is well worth the wait. Nobody wants to be too fast paced and settle for a cubic zirconia.

Just a friendly tidbit, stay beautiful.

Tabitha