So as many of you know I am married. I am HAPPILY married. I had gotten lucky and landed my man at a young age. We have been together ever since. Some of my girlfriends and other young women I have run into say that I am not so lucky. I hear,” You never dated!” and also, “You never experienced different men and sex!” I always start with a smile, but end with a solid (and sometimes hurtful) answer in response.
I would NOT fit into this “dating” world today. Why? Well because “dating” to most people now is going out to a cheap and shitty restaurant, and immediately screwing afterwards. There is no thought , or time put into the date, it is clearly all about getting laid. I’m not a saint and I don’t believe in passing too much judgment on people. But I personally wouldn’t have sex on the first date. The following are just a few reasons why:
1. You do not know this person! And casual conversation at Applebee’s isn’t going to cut it.
2. You could have a terrible and traumatic experience. Not everyone who is nice to you can be trusted.
3. Self R-E-S-P-E-C-T…(I am currently singing Aretha Franklin in my mind)
4. STD’s, nobody is worth a wart.
5. Sex is something that should be worked for, and looked forward too.
6. Why buy the cow, when the milk is free?
I mean seriously. Why would that person feel the need to wine and dine you? You are easy to get into the sack. For your sake I hope they don’t judge you as a person based on your sexual encounter, sometimes the first times aren’t always the best of times. (Unless you’re a seasoned professional)
So no I am not sad I didn’t date, because I wouldn’t do that shit anyways. I would probably be the solo person at dinner who swore off men because they get an erection when the wind blows. I have seen and heard of too many potential relationships failing due to promiscuity.
Do yourself a favor and decide what YOU want. Are you “dating” for the thrill and sex? If so get it on. Just remember there are few successful and strong relationships that are built out of just the physical. If you decide that you want more long term, hold out. Not forever, not for years, just until you know you are ready and you know that person.
Look at sex like a rare diamond. It takes work and time to obtain, but when it is had it is well worth the wait. Nobody wants to be too fast paced and settle for a cubic zirconia.
Just a friendly tidbit, stay beautiful.